The 3 Questions I Ask Friends On Their Birthday
Bookmark this for your next celebration.
What kind of birthday-haver are you? We all have our ways. Some prefer alone time, allowing the day to quietly pass. Maybe you prefer an intimate, reflective dinner with your nearest and dearest. Or perhaps (like me) you prefer to bake your mom’s secret coconut cake recipe (it’s to die!!) and everyone you’ve ever met at your favorite karaoke bar.
Surely you know your answer, but I urge you to discover your friends’ answers, too. And based on that information, you’ll know when to ask The Birthday Questions.
What are The Birthday Questions, you ask? It’s a set of three prompts designed (by me!) to create a reflective space that doesn’t feel like a total drag on a friend’s birthday. The point isn’t just for them to share — it’s for you to listen closely as they describe the shape of their dreams. Make sure to take note of their answers so you can honor and support their intentions throughout the year ahead.
There’s two soft rules regarding The Birthday Questions. Firstly, you should discuss them aloud with a friend. Accountability is key. Secondly, The Birthday Questions are most impactful on a 1:1 birthday call or during an intimate birthday dinner (a small group is fine!) as it’s an emotionally intimate exercise.
Truthfully, I have been dodging these questions (my birthday was two months ago). My best friend Hampton called me to ask them and I couldn’t talk on the phone because my family was in town for my birthday weekend. And in a way, I think I wasn’t ready to answer them yet. Last year was a weird one. But today I’m answering them for all of you even though my subscriber list is certainly bigger than an intimate dinner. Like I said, accountability is key.
Without further ado, scroll on for The Birthday Questions and my answers from November 2024.
Side note— Hampton, thank you for always seeing me, I love you.